


Can't Pull the Wool Over Your Eyes

by SailAweigh



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Comment Fic, Community: jim_and_bones, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-08
Updated: 2012-12-08
Packaged: 2017-11-20 15:31:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/586892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailAweigh/pseuds/SailAweigh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bones hates photo shoots, borrowed clothes are so uncomfortable; how does Jim always make them look like a second skin?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can't Pull the Wool Over Your Eyes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [siluria](https://archiveofourown.org/users/siluria/gifts).



> Comment fic written for [this post](http://jim-and-bones.livejournal.com/740374.html) of the Daily Captain and Daily Doctor post at [Jim and Bones](http://jim-and-bones.livejournal.com/) LJ community. Must be 18 to join the community.

"C'mon, Bones, loosen up a little, man." Jim stood off to one side, alert, but relaxed, taking in the action around him.

"I can't. This shirt scratches; it hasn't been washed and it's all starchy." Leonard wiggled a little against the wall, finally settling his butt against it and leaning forward a little to relieve the pressure of the wall against the fabric covering his back.

"You're the one who insisted on wearing the clothes 'properly' you old stick-in-the-mud. Here, let me fix it." Jim moved into the frame of the shot and reached for Leonard's shirt.

Leonard batted his hands away as they reached for the top button. "Hey, who said you could do that?" 

Leonard craned his neck over Jim's shoulder to see the photographer standing there with her hands looped around the brace of her tripod. He pointed at his boyfriend with one hand, doing his best to telegraph "get him away from me" and she shrugged her shoulders. What kind of professional was she, letting Jim muck about in her shot?

"Chill, man. Let's get some of this scratchy fabric away from your skin." Jim unbuttoned the top button and opened up the neck of the shirt, pulling up a little at the same time to lift the shirt off of Leonard's shoulders. 

Leonard relaxed his shoulders in relief and leaned back deeper into the wall, falling into a comfortable slouch. He stiffened up again, though, as Jim's hands went to the bottom of the shirt.

"Hey, hey, leave the pants alone, they're not a problem." Leonard had a feeling his protestation would be ignored and he was right.

Jim chuckled in his ear, but he didn't stop what he was doing. Leonard put his hands on Jim's chest to push him away, but stopped at the feel of the sweater under his palms. It was very soft; very, very soft and Leonard was struck with a realization.

"Jim, Jim; you need to get out of that sweater, now," Leonard urged.

Jim's bowed head shook in negation, but he looked up to give Leonard his quicksilver smile and a wink. "Save it for later, Bones. Never thought you'd be the one who'd want to ruin a photo shoot with a little hanky-panky." 

Leonard reached down to grab his hands, but Jim had already finished his task; the bottom of his shirt had been released from his pants and the lowest button opened to show his belt buckle. Jim's hands stopped there.

"See? Now you're all relaxed and approachable looking. If you'd just let the dresser do this from the start, we'd have been done with this much sooner and you could be tearing my sweater off me right now."

Leonard grabbed Jim's elbow and started to push away from the wall. Jim's other hand came up to stop Leonard. "Ah-ah, Bones. Finish the photo shoot. We've got plenty of time to play around later. The PR department will tattle to Pike if we don't complete this before the _Enterprise_ leaves next week."

"But your _sweater_ \--"

"Makes my eyes look incredibly blue, don't you think? The sweater can wait, Bones. Let the nice lady take your picture and we can go. You look completely ravishing, by the way. We can play pirate captain when you've been a good boy and posed for the camera. I'll even let you be the captain."

Leonard snorted back a laugh despite his concern. He threw his arms up in the air and leaned back against the wall again. "Okay, okay. I'll behave. Let's get this over with."

Jim stepped back out of the shot, resuming his relaxed stance with his hands in his pockets and a slight curve to his mouth. Leonard found himself relaxing, too. If Jim could stand it, so could he.

Fifteen minutes later, with his eyes dazzled by the glare of the flash, Leonard found himself in wardrobe again with Jim. Once the door shut behind him, he reached for the bottom of Jim's sweater and pulled it straight over Jim's head before the man could utter a word. A slight squeak emerged anyway.

"Jesus, Bones. I said it could wait until we got home."

"Relax, jackass; I am saving that for home. But, sometimes, Jim, you have more self-control than a Benedictine monk, which plumb amazes me, but about the wrong things. How have you been able to stand this sweater for so long?" Jim and Leonard both looked at the rash that covered Jim's chest and stomach. Leonard knew it would be the same on his back.

"Didn't want to disappoint the wardrobe department. They were so happy to put me in something they thought would show off my best features and their newest product line; I just went along with it." Jim reached up to scratch at his chest.

"Stop that, you'll just make it worse." Leonard captured Jim's hand and pulled it away from the inflamed skin.

"But, cashmere, Jim! You could have told them you were allergic to wool, you know. They wouldn't have made you wear something you were so obviously uncomfortable in." Tugging him over to the cupboard holding their street clothes, Leonard pulled out the flannel shirt Jim had been wearing when the arrived earlier in the day.

"Here, put this back on. When we get home, I'll run the regenerator over your rash." Leonard shucked his outfit quickly, pulling on his own jeans and the Ole Miss sweatshirt he'd worn coming there that morning.

"Oh, so we'll play naughty nurse instead of pirate captain, today?" Jim's smile was playful as it emerged from the neck of his cotton t-shirt that he wore under the flannel.

Leonard rolled his eyes. "Yes, Jim; we'll play naughty nurse. We both know you're the only captain on the ship or in our bedroom, anyway."

Jim finished buttoning up the flannel shirt. "Can't pull the wool over your eyes, Bones. Well, then; let's get home so we can get this party started."


End file.
